Congratulations K!!

Well, I don't think he even follows my rants here, but I just want to send out a big congrats to one of my best buddies on the planet, Kelso... K had a baby out in Saskatchewan last night. We met first year back at the U of L and we were both in eachother's wedding parties in the past 2 years... It's the first of my friends to have a bouncing baby (and a girl, for that matter), so all the best to him. I'm patiently awaiting some of the first pictures which he tried (and failed!) to send through email. For anyone here that knows K, I'll send along greetings for you. Hell, even if you don't know him, send him some love! Until again...

- T

I'm still alive... and tired

I guess it's been almost 2 weeks since I've put up a post. Part of the reason for this is the fact that I didn't have too much pressing to share (not that I do now, but I was going through some blog withdrawal). The other reason is that school has been tremendously busy. But, the recent "semester" came to a close today and I can get away with being a bump on a log for a night without having the guilt of ignoring homework over my head. However, anyone that knows me understands that I'm pretty good at ignoring the guilt and procrastinating. I've got a disease... it's called procrastinosis. And it's highly contagious, so if you have stuff to do, maybe it's better that you ignore me.

School's been a little insane, and I've really been struggling with the fact that I am quite possibly the worst time-organizer on the planet. Or, at least on the block surrounding Oak Bay junction. I had to hand in 2 unit plans, a short 1000 word paper, and 7 journal entries, as well as give a short 10 minute "mini-lesson" for my English methods class, all in the past 3 days. Rather than working ahead and getting things done ahead of schedule, I sit on my rump and wait until the last possible second to start a project. I think the most frustrating part of this is the fact that I don't even realize I'm doing it... I just wake up the day before a project and realize that, hey! I've got to hand in a 25-30 page unit plan the next day and I don't have much of anything done for it! Something has to change sometime. Maybe I can get subsidized and be able to hire a personal organizer named Ted to follow me around and get me to do work in advance rather than at 4:45 a.m. (which is what time I went to bed on Monday night).

Okay, enough of the pity party. I'm going to post a few things that, lately, have really made my day. The first is from one of my best friends from out in Saskatchewan... he sent me an email the other day with a translation site that allows you to see your name in Russia. Check it out...

http://www.callme.nm.ru/

The second one was posted on R's site as well as J's site. It's a "youtube" link featuring a clip from the John Stewart Show. It shows Ted Stevens, a somewhat infamous buffoon and Senator from Alaska who is describing "internets", or "tubes". It's pretty wonderful...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6iMDRVzMfEM&search=ted%20stevens%20internets

J posted another link that showed the wonderful powers of dropping Mentos mints into Diet Coke... also wonderful...

http://www.eepybird.com/dcm1.html

Enjoy, and I'll be back again soon...

- T

They call me Mr. No Hair

It's official.

I've taken it upon myself (with the help of my adoring wife) to embrace the reality of my thinning hair and sacrifice what used to be my relatively short mop to the gods of the somewhat mighty hair clippers.

I have talked about the old buzz cut for months now. I had no choice, really. It was inevitable. The entire maternal side of my family has been victimized by male pattern baldness. And as everyone has seen, there is a male propensity to try and cover it up by the slyest of methods available. These include the following:

1) The comb forward... when the hair starts retreating from the facial area, why not brush what's left to the front?

2) The comb-over... when you're past the comb-forward, the comb-over combines the brushing techniques of all directions. This is typically the choice of 1970's LA cops, librarians, and American politicians.

3) The toupee (also known as the "rug" or "carpet")... as the nicknames might imply, this technique is usually manifested in a poor performance. Like an ugly plywood floor, one would think that coverage is a good idea. Until you realize that off-white shag is never a good idea.

4) Hair In A Can (my personal favorite)... did you ever see the Ron Popeil infomercials that challenged balding men everywhere to purchase the revolutionary cure to thinning hair? The Hair in a Can involves a 14in x 14in piece of plywood with an oval-like hole the size of the customer's head cut out of the middle. The next step is to give the canister of Hair in a Can a good shake (remember, big smiles!). The third step involves placing the plywood over the head to protect the ears, and spray said hair product over the crown to cover up all areas of oncoming baldness. The final step is to remove the plywood skull-protector from the head, use a comb to lightly fluff remaining hair/new hair to create a "real" hair finish. Dries in a mere 4 hours.

Although these options are all highly intriguing and all have immense chick-magnet elements, I have decided to bypass them all and move straight to the buzz cut. With my wife by my side (clippers in hand), I closed my eyes and she slowly shaved the shag away and left me with about 3/8ths of an inch of stubble. I think I cried... just a little. But it's done, it's over, and I have to press on. I even took the garbage out so as to rid myself of any remaining reminders of what used to be.

Do I love it? Well, not yet. K thinks I look great, and she's been immensely supportive throughout the experience. And I appreciate it, since I know it's an honest response (she's terrible at lying unless it has to do with shoes purchases). So I guess I'll face the world (and my peers) tomorrow without any regrets (and maybe with a hat, so as to prevent any potential laughter and the possibility of a skullcap sunburn). Gotta move on and leave the proverbial hair behind.

- T

A plug for a friend of a friend, and one for a website...

Since no one was too interested in my tirade from the other day, here's a couple things to look at.

First, two of my friends know a Canadian Idol contestant from, I think, Season 3, that was born and raised in Drumheller, AB. Her name is Jenn Beaupre, and has a fantastic voice. I heard her first 2 songs about 5 years ago, and her voice has matured a tonne since then. If you're interested in listening to her music and getting some free info/downloads, you can find her stuff at www.myspace.com/jennbeaupremusic Take a listen.

Second, I'm taking another cue from L.G's blog. She mentioned a website where you can type in a song name or your favorite band, and the site will create an ongoing playlist that will stream into your computer. It's like a preferential personal radio station that plays both the song/band you mentioned, and plays similar stuff that you may be interested in. If you like the song, you can give it a thumbs up and the site will play more of that kind... if you don't, give it a thumbs down and it will steer clear of it. Try it. Love it. Embrace it. www.pandora.com

That's all for now...

- T

A world of similarities...

I've been thinking a good deal lately about the differences among people, and the relationship of our identities in contrast to the identities of others. Another thing that's been on my mind (that comes and goes from time to time) is the notion of our nationalist persona in the eyes of the rest of the world. This may be a long rant, so get some coffee and make sure you have a few minutes if you plan to read ahead.

I was having a conversation with an extremely pleasant gentleman the other night at work about the Canadian opinion of Americans. He was visiting from California and was planning on taking a job here in B.C. and moving his wife and children to this wonderful island. He's been a political science professor for a number of years, and although he seems to have dabbled in a variety of other career and academic areas, he's thoroughly interested in political science and history in relationship to people and their general ideas.

During the Canada Day celebrations on the Inner Harbour, he and his family walked by a group of teens that were being somewhat-typical crass kids. Although they did not seem to be considering the man and his family in any specific manner, they made a comment about doing something to Americans, most probably because there's never a shortage of US tourists moving through Victoria in the summer. His wife became worried about the mentality of Canadians concerning our southern neighbours, and they were worried that there could be some explicit action taken against them due to their geographical identity. He posed a question to me... is this type of aggression something to worry about? And could they ever expect any sort of incident if people were to learn of their citizenship background?

I reassured him that 99.99% of what he heard was the careless talk of kids, and that I'd never heard of anything of the sort taking place specifically because a person was American. I also told him that, if asked, a good number of Canadians, both old and young, would not hesitate to offer their negative opinions on Americans and American politics if asked, especially in this area of the country. There's no need to point out the obvious fact that Bush isn't generally seen as a popular guy these days (or for most days passed either). However, I was concerned that a careless, idiotic comment like the one coming from these punks could be manifested as a serious threat to visiting Americans.

We discussed briefly the nature of separating the politics from the people. I know for a fact that some people are going to say that in a democratic society, the politics ARE the people. But on a more realistic note, this isn't exactly the case. Let's remember that more people voted for Kerry than Bush numbers-wise, but due to the setup of the US electoral program, Bush won. Not once, but twice. Like it or not (understand it, or don't), it's a fact of life. We must also remember that the majority of voting-age citizens in the US also didn't cast ballots, so the idea that Bush IS the American identity made manifest is misleading. And let's get right to the point... stereotypes get us nowhere.

The fact of the matter is... Canadians (myself included for a long time) build their national identity in a sort of anti-mimetic fashion. Canadians are all the best of what America is, but more importantly, is made up of what America isn't. We have this generalized notion of who we are in the global environment, but we pride ourselves on the fact that what we are is exactly what Americans are not. We villify America and claim our virtue in comparison. Canadians are open-minded. Americans are close-minded imbeciles. Canada is multi-cultural. America is a melting-pot. Canadians are polite, humble, simple folk. Americans are crass, ignorant, and self-involved. The world loves Canadians. The world hates Americans.

First and foremost, let's get rid of these fairytales. These are very misleading and are altogether ridiculous stereotypes. Canadians see themselves as hyper-important in the global eye. The fact is that Canada, in the eyes of most people worldwide, is just another part of North America, and the accents and politics are indecipherable from Americans. For others, we don't even register as an independent nation. Is this necessarily a bad thing? I don't think so. We're a nation of just over 30 million people. Sure, geographically speaking we're the second biggest political landscape in the world, but our population is minute comparatively. Do people learn about Canada? Not really, unless they're teaching a Canadian curriculum at the school in which the students are educated. Canada's only been a recognizable nation for about 140 years. I understand that the first settlers came centuries before the BNA act, and that the First Nations have inhabited the landscape long before Europeans ever came, but as far as global politics in concerned, we're the new kids on the block. Are Canadians really that open-minded? I've been working service jobs for 9 years now and I could provide a lot of evidence to the contrary. Are Americans the close-minded folk we assume they are? I've met a couple that are. But I've met just as many Canadians that are. And I've met countless pleasant, good-natured Americans... moreso than the ones that may seem to give a bad name to the whole country. The problem is the fact that we focus on these characteristics.

A guy from school, K, mentioned that most people in any sort of tourist destination have seen an ignorant southern tourist berate the people waiting on them at a store/restaurant for any number of reasons. We immediately associate this bad behaviour with being American, the give-away being the fact that they have American Flag t-shirts on and speak with a southern drawl. The vast majority of us are quick to forget that when a local clown acts in the same absurd manner, we omit the nationality in question. We don't see a neighbour of ours and say "stupid Canadian" if he's acting like a buffoon. If he does something stupid and he has license plates on his car from Ontario, then we say "stupid easterners" or something similar, but we'd never resort to "stupid Canuck" or another such label. We're all guilty of it. And if you don't think you are, then I either give you cudos or suggest you tune into the channel of Get Real. The latter will be the more likely response.

Are we multi-cultural? Sure, but this has also been one of the complex factors of establishing an identity. We can't forget about the Quebec separation movement that still exists in pockets of the province. Hell, the Separation Party of Alberta even has supporters. What happened to this idea that Canada was a united nation of like-minded individuals? Like I was saying, there's a lot of evidence to point out this absurdity. We establish ourselves as Quebecois, or Albertan, or Torontonians. Every facet has it's labels. Many people in Alberta seriously think that BC is full of hippies and Ontario's full of crooks, and that the east coast is a bunch of fun-loving Celtic drunks who speak in an undecipherable dialect. Ask the people from the east coast what they think of Albertans and the Alberta-centric worldview comes seriously into question. Live in someone's house, meet someone outside of your socio-economic background, and you'll see that things aren't that much different on the other side of the fence.

I guess the point of this little tirade is simply to point out the truth behind the cliche that everyone has differences, both good and bad. The Canadian track record in international affairs is questionable at best, and we must remember that we have our fair share of overt problems, personally and nationally. We must also remember that distinguishing such traits for a group of people within a country or bordered landscape does little to talk about the individual people that we encounter every day. Let's keep our differences... hell, lets embrace them. But at the end of the day, recall the fact that the same red blood runs through our veins. If we can't do that, we're sunk no matter what we do. And get rid of the chip that resides so influentially on our shoulders... it can get so big that it blocks the peripheral view of the rest of the world that we forget to look around for.

- T